Big Ass Update!

This is going to probably be one of those updates that are like guests that over stay their welcome. But it's the end of August and if I don't talk about these stories now then it'll be too late to tell them at all and they will forever be forgotten in my mind that's like a steel siv.

First story: I thank god that I'm a man.

I don't have a lot to complain about my life. I'm one of the few people that actually enjoys going to work, my family doesn't really fight a lot, I have no significant debt, I've got food to eat, a car that works, and a girl that loves me. So I'm not complaining about my life, far from it. There are however times when I feel "disjointed." It's a feeling marked with some disconnection with the world, as if my plug into the matrix had been tripped over and some new intern is desperately trying to fumble my connection back into my head.

I was actually looking forward to letting Her take me to synagogue (I affectionately call it "gog"). I'm not a spiritual person let alone religious and my attitude towards religion is probably similar to some people's attitude to plushies; some times it's weird, some times you really want them to stop but for the most part it's harmless and if people want to do it whatever, please don't do it in front of me or better yet don't tell me.

So, in a moment of weakness (bad connection to the matrix, stupid intern) I actually was hoping that the "gog" and jewish religion would bring about a reboot, a reconnect if you will. Sadly (happily?) that didn't really happen. I did enjoy myself more than I usually did though as we (they) discussed labor day and to remember and appreciate the people oh whom this holiday is SUPPOSED to be for but in a cruel twist of reality are the only ones that are working on that day.

So thank you, person who was working at the wedding place we visited this weekend.
Thank you, mailmen, trashmen, firemen and various other government workers.
Thank you, farmers, retail people, janitors and various service industry workers.
Thank you movie theater workers, grocers, food service and other entertainment workers.
Thank you all for working so hard in making all our lives livable. I promise to stay inside and give you guys as little trouble as possible during your day that you were supposed to be napping instead of helping me. Thank you.

So I'm disjointed. As I'm just about to utter a complaint a person I know falls flat on her head. Why does she fall flat on her head? Because she was was having such a rough part of the month that she just passed out from the loss of blood. Now, I've given blood before and I've given up to two pints of blood in a sitting but I have never felt like I was going to pass out. So I can only imagine how much blood one has to lose to want to pass out.

So I get it, my life it good. I've got nothing to complain about. I'm a man, and I don't bleed out of my cock. So I'm good whoever's listening. I've got no complaints. Thanks.



Story 2: We've got babies and I'm going to eat them.

Check out how big of a genius Her is. Not only did she convince me to buy some herbs, but she got me to plant them with her. Not only am I now being tested on my ability to be nurturing and sustain life but she also made me think it was my idea, and that I've always wanted to do this. Not only am being watched I even think it's great! How she did this should never document should men and women ever be equal. Know this however, I will eat them one day and it will be delicious.



Story 3: Wedding venue visit

We went to a place that Her fell in love with from the internet this weekend. We went with her parents and... and... God I'm still fucking exhausted from all of it. Ask her to tell you about it.



Story 4: The gay pride parade

We went to a gay pride parade because Her has never been to a parade before let alone a gay pride parade which, of the parades that exists are the most colorful. I've got a bunch of pictures but don't know if I'm allowed to post them. I guess I'll have to save them for a post in the future and... and...

.....

God I'm tired of talking. You must be tired of me talking by now. I guess I'll leave it here for August, see you in September.